Skeeter Davis Alert™: 100 prophecies that will be true by the end of 2011. But only one on the cover.

Publication: Sun
Date: 31 Oct 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! The Sun says they have 100 prophecies that will come true before the end of 2011, which averages to more than one prophecy a day. The only one on the cover is that Jesus will return after al Qaeda attacks the United States on Thanksgiving Day.

Longtime readers know my rules. If they give a specific date and a specific event, I am honor bound to print it AND to report back to see if it happened.

The other think worth mentioning is the line-up of important prophets put on the cover. We have John the Baptist, Mary Magdalene, Black Elk, and at long last...

the return of...

Nikki, Psychic to the Stars!

I can even begin to say how much I've missed her.

Skeeter Davis Alert™: The Mayans get everything right. On a ridiculously easy test.

Publication: Sun
Date: 24 Oct. 2011

My rules on printing predictions about the End of the World from the cover of the Sun are straightforward. If they give a date and events to expect by that date, I will print it.

On that date, I'll let folks know if any of the stuff came true.

Usually... not so much.

This time, the Sun says the Mayans are right because of these omens already coming true.

• Wildfires
• Terror threats
• Killer quakes
• Raging floods

These are supposed to happen before December 31, 2012. Even if we don't count the ones that have already happened this year, it's a stone cold lock that all these things will happen somewhere in the world in the next 62 weeks or so.

I guess when it comes to the End of the World, after you get it wrong so many times, you start grading on the curve.

Skeeter Davis Alert™: The hidden prophecies of... JFK?!?

Publication: Sun

Date: 12 Sept. 2011



Fresh trash on Thursdays! The Sun has been known to make up prophets, like Gordon Elk L'Suk, or claim that someone made prophecies who didn't, like Mother Teresa. Now they are claiming that John F. Kennedy was clairvoyant, and his prophecies include a date in the near future. Here are the headlines.

• Predicts his exact assassination date
• Warns Jackie: don't marry Onassis
• China to attack U.S. in 2012
  
  

Well, it's wacky, but it does have a date in the foreseeable future. There have been cyber-attacks that people have claimed have come from governments, but I'm going to say JFK wouldn't know about that, and for this prophecy to be true we need an actual physical assault on American soil, American troops or American property.

Skeeter Davis Alert™: Indian scroll says all final prophecies come true in the next 100 days!

Publication: Sun

Date: 5 September 2011



Fresh trash on Thursdays! The Sun does me the courtesy of a specific date for their latest gloom and doom, saying a Native American scroll shows that the Rapture, Armageddon, the Second Coming and several new disasters will be coming in the next 100 days, which if I counted it correctly means a due date of Saturday, December 3 of this year at the very latest.

Honestly, anything that might stop this jackass from becoming President of the United States would be an improvement.



I will probably still be here to report, oh me of little faith.

Skeeter Davis alert: Goverment death map!

Publication: Sun

Date: 22 August 2011



Usually, I don't print anything from the Sun unless there are specific dates which can be checked, but this week's story about the government death map had a picture of popular tabloid target Barack Elvis Obama and the beginning paragraphs of the story on the cover instead of just a few headlines.



I am reporting on this because of a single phrase I wanted to quote, the detail that this map of where disasters are most likely to strike was compiled by "respected civil engineers, gifted psychics and Bible scholars".



How can you not feel comforted here about a talented line-up like that working on the government dime?

Skeeter Davis Alert™: Nostradamus gets very specific about September 11, 2011!

Publication: Sun

Date: 15 August 2011



Once again the Sun relies on everyone's favorite vague French 16th Century poet and prophet Michel de Nostradamus for several specific events that will happen on September 11, 2011.



Some folks might have wished he could be this accurate and specific ten years ago, but let's not cry over spilled milk, shall we?



On the tenth anniversary of the terror attack, we can expect these horrors and signs.

• Nuclear blast rocks U.S.
• Great depression
• Bin Laden seen alive!
• Lady Liberty speaks
• Antichrist is a woman!
  
  

I don't believe any of this stuff, but I will report back on September 12. If the last one is true, my money is on Sarah Palin or Michele Bachmann, but that's just me.

Skeeter Davis Alert™: More bad stuff for 2011!

Publication: Sun

Date: 8 August 2011



The Sun has given us more bad things that will happen this year and credited some of their "most reliable" psychics. Of course they use everyone's favorite vague French 16th Century poet and prophet, Michel de Nostradamus, but also Black Elk, John the Baptist and Mother Teresa, a line-up they have used before.



No Nikki, Psychic to the Stars, sad to say.



The stuff that is supposed happen: Al Qaeda nukes, a White House scandal and a Medicare meltdown.



As long as the Tea Party has its way, the third thing is an option. The second could also take place. The first one... not really believable.



We'll see. And I promise to report back on 1/1/2012.

I've been confused about using Mother Teresa as a prophet. Teresa of Avila, sure, but Teresa of Calcutta? Well, her organization disavows this stuff and wishes people would stop. Not that their wishes carry any weight with a two-bit rag like the Sun.

Skeeter Davis Alert™: Seven deadly omens signal Judgment Day in 2011!

Publication: Sun
1 August 2011

Once again, the Sun wants us to know we live in The End Times, even though people who take the Bible seriously shouldn't believe a word of this. They say there are seven deadly omens, but they only give three on the cover, so those are the only ones I include in this post.

• Worldwide riots
• Killer storms
• New great depression
  

Usually, I say I will report back at the time when these things are supposed to take place. Unlike most of the predictions, these are both common enough and vague enough that I expect at least one and maybe two of them to come true. After all, the Atlantic hurricane season has yet to take place and there are always deaths somewhere due to them, so "killer storms" is pretty much a lock. Riots are common enough and as for the word "depression" to describe the current economic mess, even Paul Krugman is using it now, though he calls it the Lesser Depression.

The only thing far fetched is that these events will be signs of the End Times. It's just the everyday crap we live with, so don't get all drama queen about it.